Yusraa

 I think there are phases in waiting .The first being one with lots of pain and the desire pulling us, "I want it. I want to have it. I need it." It's the time when you breakdown when each door closes, where you try vigorously, all that you can in your power. It's the phase that is filled with deep pain, heartbreaks but also the inability to lose hope. Phase 2 is kinda different. You get used to it. You get used to the situation not changing, you still try your best  but you understand now that you have absolutely no control, so the rejections and failures leave you unfazed. You just keep moving, sometimes the exhaustion wears you out after a period of time, but you still want it and you believe it will be given to you. Every time you see someone else with it, or a post about it, you flinch. You wait for relief because even though you are patient, the days are long and nights are endless.   Phase 3 is a weird phase. By this time, you don't care anymore. The desire...

 There are times that makes us realize that every story in the Quran isn't just  story. There were times when I used to think it's weird that the Quran always have the stories in bits and pieces, and not in continuation. Why would the Best Author write it that way? It didn't really make sense. And there are times when some details are just left out, like for how many people actually slept in the cave in Surah Al-Kahf. It's as though Allah tells us that those aren't important, the point of the story was something else.  As you grow older, you kinda realize that the stories aren't just stories, it's real life. Every character is real, and every Prophet(as) was a reference and every character, they encountered are people you will encounter. And every bits and pieces of their lives that were mentioned, are the incidents that we will encounter in our lives too, in just different ways, but the core of it is the same. When Ibrahim(as) understood that God can't ...

How amazing it is to have a protector, someone who shields you, someone who knows you better than yourself, someone who loves you, someone who manages all your affairs,takes care of you, embraces you, someone who listens to your rambles everyday, someone who does things for you in ways you didn't imagine and when you look at how they've been there all along with you, you feel their warm hug. That's mercy. Mercy that holds you while your broken, which sends people, things to remind you. Mercy that embraces you and tells you to trust. Mercy even though you were ungrateful.  I didn't really get it the first time my teacher said, "Perhaps you don't have faith, because you don't see Him. Whereas I see Him everywhere, in very nook and corner of my life, even when my cookies turn out right."  But as every situation unfolded with me praying istikhara, I started to see Him too. Everywhere. In every text I received, every call, every person I met, the most silli...