Yusraa

 2 weeks after the miracle guy(I like to call him as "The Bird"- the bird Allah used to send a message to me, telling me that He heard me), I met another family. I didn't like the guy, I was still not over the previous proposal yet, but everyone pushed me to give it a chance and I thought I shall. It was first a video call with his family, I didn't really hope for anything, I just hoped that they wouldn't want me. His family kept calling before that too, continuously, almost everyday that it disturbed my sense of peace, to an extent that I wanted to just run away. And I hated the nervousness and anxiety that came with it. The fear and I kept wishing I could get the chance to visit another guy who was supposed to come but couldn't as his dad got hospitalized and the family situations changed, making marriage their least priority. His family visited, they spoke well, his cousins looked well educated, but I didn't like his mom. She seemed too pushy, too cling...

 After every broken proposal, with people that came with different intentions than what I was expecting, I lost hope. I was on the verge of giving up, it seemed impossible that someone like me would find a man like what I was searching for. It seemed too delusional but I kept asking Allah (swt), to allow me to witness the resurrection of the birds, the same way He allowed Ibrahim (as) to. To witness what I asked for, in my reality, so that my heart may rest in peace and increase in yaqeen.  Whispering in tahajjud, in the middle of the night, while traveling to work and back home, all the characteristics that I would like him to have. I kept making dua even for the tiniest things and when I thought it was all over, a proposal came.      I wasn't convinced of it, but I spoke to him on the phone first, I was scared,nervous, thought it'd be awkward, but he started speaking, his nervousness evident too in his laughs. He went on about himself, a lot about his work and...